I wrote this like 2 days ago

Dude working on this website for the past like week has been so hype and yet I still have no idea what to do with this blog to make it actually worthwhile. I missed going to the gym like 3 times this week because I was just working on the website for like a couple hours and until I got too tired and went to bed. Which is really funny for some reason I think, it reminds me of the first time I would code minecraft plugins and I would like get home from school and stay up trying to figure out how to spoof the packets to trigger a block crack animation to clients. Minecraft is really hype isnt it. I think perhaps a good incentive a blog or any sort of thing like this creates is to make you actually do things with your days / week so you have actual things to write about. That was part of the thought of word of the day when I started it, if I made myself post a word of the day story everyday I would also force myself to go out and do something worth posting it, or thing something worth posting it too everyday aswell, but then I realized you could take a picture of the concrete ceiling and leave the quip for others to find within themselves and that incentive failed to materialize. I do love word of the day though still. And there is also a beauty in not always providing a quip yourself, leaving the air open. Which is weird, it never feels like you are speaking just the right amount of thinking just the right amount, it is either that your mind feels completely empty and your scraping around for anything or that its too full that you dont have any room, never in that perfect middle. Or when you think you are, something will quickly remind you that you arent. Like when you’re like oh yeah Im like in a good place then you talk to someone and you realize like you have no thoughts and nothing to say and your mind feels like a vaccum. Or you’re like I tihink im a good plcae and then you’re alone and your bouncing off the walls or stressed out or something. Always on the extremes, no idea why. This blog post by the way is a good example of “writing to think” one time i was watching that one goated backend developer youtuber guy (iykyk) and he was talking about writing his like third book or whatever and he talked about the best advice he ever got being to write to think instead of thinking to write, that if you sit down and tell yourself, I am going to write then something will eventually come out and that something might be horrible, but at least it will exist somewhere. My 9th grade honors english teacher had a similar idea, I remember him talking about how the best way to get a good grade in the class is jsut to write everything that came to our mind, because none of our writing was going to be “good”, he made that very clear that we were all stupid 9th grades who picked boogers out of our noses and were only interested in making sandwiches, but that if we wrote enough in all likelyhood something would immerge that would have even a modicum of a interesting idea within it. Which he would obiviously reward us for. I thought he was really cool, I disagreed with him on basically everything but though he was really cool.

So far (this is sample size of 2) I have made a habbit of not editing these blog posts at all, I just post them as I think them as it were, which I kind of like, and maybe I will keep this trend, or I wont. What you dont know is I have been secretly and manically sending each of them to claude periodically after i write them to ask me what its thoughts were, which is really quite sad when I say it but its more like Im just curious, most of the time it defaults to trying to explain the posts in terms of quality, either of writing, content, it said for this one for example how the section of never thinking the write amount goes on and on. Which is probably true, but I wont change it. Its interesting because when you see ai think, in the fake chain of thought token junky way its so rational and orderly typically, or its not in a very like obvious understandable way, but this is some raw unadultered human thoughts bitch (claude liked this line) we dont organize shit. I am also just a serial ai user (proof is in the github for this very site) and so I will just randomly plug stuff in there to see what it thinks.